I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Why is your signature on my underwear?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Randomize
