if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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