the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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