Christians are straight up FREAKS
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
