So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
It's Friday. Sex?
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Randomize
