My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
