he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
