I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
This baby is an asshole
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
