Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
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