at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
