Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
