Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize