He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
