Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
