Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
