I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
