Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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