but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
