A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
