i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
