i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize