dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Hippo gnu deer
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
