Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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