windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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