Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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