dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
