Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
You don't make any sense
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Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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