with your own penis?
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
He passed out mid-signature
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
We are all done wearing pants today
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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