I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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