wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
