I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
