He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
She bit a glass in half.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
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