Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize