Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
