You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
