the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize