thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
