i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
