you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
