at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
