I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
It's just like the Real World with babies
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Someone came in the potted fern
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Randomize
