everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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