it hurts more in the daytime
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
