Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Randomize
