just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Randomize
