Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
