i just google imaged poop.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
