S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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