yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
