I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
